Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Zoe deschanel

I heard she divorced the guy from modest mouse/ death cab for cutie and is now engaged to all of weezer. I look forward to their collective ceremony.

I'd like to start a grassroots movement: The Let's Lower Zoe Deschanel's Self Esteem Project. Really, it's almost unseemly how high it is. After we finish with Zoe, we could start in on Scarlet Johansa.

Zoe Deschanel is a basically Goldie Hawn. For hipsters.

Rumour has it Zoe's got a solo album of sacred music on the way: She & Hymn

Zoe Deschanel grew up on a commune in Oregon, and spent her evenings howling at the moon with her sister.

Zoe Deschanel spends her time fingerpainting in between scenes. And playing the melodica.

Goldie Hawn + Pitchfork = Zoe Deschanel.

If Zoe and Scarlett Johansen got married and adopted an Asian baby and named it Bacon...the Internetz would implode. 

Even Zoe Deschanel's bangs are self impressed.

M. Ward finally got sick of playing second fiddle, and renamed the band Him & She

Fun game #1: Let's guess the track names of the inevitable She & Him Children's Album. I'll start:
1. Vegan Birthing Ceremony (intro)
2. Gluten-free Birthday Party!
3. My Baby Drinks PBR
4. Mommy Plays The Drums
5. Ironic Nursery Rhyme
6. Eco-Baby Activist
7. Don't Wanna (Cut My Bangs)
8. Playground Performance Art
9. My Art Teacher (Plays the Ukulele)
10. Baby's First Dirty Projectors Show
11. Yo La Tangwho?
12. Fixed Gear Bikin' (Helmets On Mix)

Zoe Deschanel has an imaginary friend named Artemis.

I want to crash her band: She & Him & Me

I intentionally misspell her name. Such is my form of protest.

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