Tuesday, June 17, 2008

games of the golden children part one: Geocaching

jesus christ people, can i just say what the fuck is up with geocaching?

let's just call it what it is - revisionist easter egg hunts for white liberal techies obsessed with their svelte applesque electronic accoutrements. i see their kind, sprouted like kudzu during a humid summer. spending as much transit time as possible in communion with one of the infinite varieties of small silver communication devices- hey, why just travel when i can also conference call, or plan my next hula-hoop gathering or yoga retreat?

whoever decided to sex up grandma's quaint old easter egg hunt by shoehorning in the gps, emblem of the zeitgeist that is our oh so progressive electronic global village, then combining the irritatingly trendy "geo" and "caching" ('cause it makes me feel so topical, so now, so attuned when i say these words), well, this person deserves a place in the pt barnum hall of fame. what a perfect way to entice the i-sciples.

thus, verily i say unto you, america's earnest, the well-meaning, the self-consciously all-inclusive,the golden children: sally forth into the darkened hinterlands, bold electronic geo-explorers! bring back to us, the primitive, the domesticated, the trepid, bring back your hard won whole foods and ll bean coupons, your coupons for 50 free apple store downloads, etc. etc.


peppergomez said...

oh yeah, it's totally inclusive but umm, you can't play unless you bring your wholly inessential $300 portable gps unit. you mean you don't have one? oh, i'm sorry to hear that. you should totally text me though when you get one. seriously.

(shuffles off, feeling vaguely ashamed)

Agent Polsky said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
peppergomez said...

but do you shit like one?